Why Disguising As “Empathic”, “Loving” and “Caring” Doesn’t Lead You to an Intimate Relationship
There are some with the tendency to “devote” themselves so blindly to their spouses that an adoration is considered to be sacrifice. Maeve Binchy, an admired Irish writer, has written one of her short stories about an individual who, after falling in love and cut down her studies to help her boyfriend organize his academic conferences. She also assisted him with editing his CV. It was “just fine” between them until she was pregnant, and he decided to leave the woman…
Are people so naive? Is it logical to sacrifice yourself to such a total level? Do you feel that love is blinding you and cause you to feel dizzy? Aren’t people aware that relationships in intimate relationships are supposed to be mutual giving and taking and in the event that the relationship is the case, then the case, the relationship will fall going downhill? Aren’t they aware that investing in their own self-esteem while in the course of a relationship (and not just with their spouse) is investing in the relationship, and at the same time, in the relationship?
What is it that drives people to give 100 100% in support of the sake of their partner(s)?
What causes people to “love so much”? to act like they’re totally “empathic” towards their partner?
I’m saying “as if” since this isn’t a true empathy, nor a genuine one. What they are trying to accomplish by using”empathy” is to “empathy” is convince their partner that they’re there 100 100% – so that their loved ones to feel loved, respect them and appreciate their “empathy”, think highly of them.
In a way, showing such a large amount of “empathy” is a manipulation You don’t behave this way because you’re truly empathic. You do it in order to receive some thing “in return”.
What motivates you to act in this manner is your personal needs and issues that dictate your behavior and force you to behave according to your beliefs that will earn you the affection, love, and appreciation you wish to earn. Knowing that these behavior patterns have helped you in the past, to achieve the same result however, you phim xxx keep using them again and time again, thereby manipulating people over and over again. Wow! This is a miracle!
Sometimes, you may act like this to alleviate loneliness. You have to be around others (“partners” sometimes) for the sake of not feel lonely; so that you feel like you are worthy of something. In order to achieve this goal you’ve “invented” yourself as an “empathic”, all-understanding, people-person who is all-hears, and someone that you love being around (since they get from the person they are with they receive from them! You are the total “love” and “care” they’ll ever need! ).
It’s a “dance” between you and them makes you feel happy It’s a good thing that you’ve been able to get them into loving and appreciating you, and more importantly, to be interested in your company! Doesn’t this make you feel great? Don’t you think it makes you feel smarter?
However, what happens is that slowly and surely they begin to take advantage of you by soliciting you to lend their money (which they don’t pay back) or to care for their cat while they are away on vacation, or to assist them in fixing their computer when it fails?
You perform all of these with joy. You feel that you are valued and loved…
Did you know that your friends and family members profit by taking advantage of “empathy” and “love”?
Have you ever thought that they’ve come understand your manipulative behaviour and have learned to profit from you – and you aren’t aware that they’ve “discovered” your false authenticity and “empathy”?
It’s not so obvious. It may be difficult to accept that they’ve realized that you’re far from the person you’ve presented yourself as. More than that, it could be difficult to admit for yourself that you haven’t been sincere about it (with your beloved family members or partners!). In addition, everything, it could be difficult to admit to yourself that your behavior is caused by a need or a feeling of loneliness and desperation that are the basis of who you are!
Most likely, you’ll continue to behave the way you are. Most likely, you will never discover what drives you to behave in the manner you do. Most likely, you’ve reached an age that you say to yourself – “let me just keep doing what I have done so far; let me just enjoy the small friendships I have made so far, without hoping for better ones or a truly good relationship”.
It is actually easy to stay with the status quo instead of trying to alter it in any way. Then you relax by telling yourself that at least when you are with people who surround you, the solitude isn’t too difficult; and the need for true intimacy could be replaced – just as it was until recently by other types of bonds you share with other people.
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